Am I a Writer?

I have never considered myself a writer. I like to write—sometimes. I don’t love analytical essays. Poetry doesn’t flow out of me like a…I can’t think of the right simile. And I have received far too many comments on my short stories telling me to show instead of tell. 

At the same time, I have always loved to read and discuss literature: novels, plays, poetry. While I have a love-hate relationship with them, I always take on each analytical essay as an opportunity to challenge myself in a new way. And sometimes, on occasion, I write subpar poetry when I’m feeling the feels. 

I know people who are writers. For example, my best friend, Liv, has an incredible gift for writing. Every time I read her work I am taken aback. Each word, each sentence, each thought is perfectly crafted. I read the drafts of my Rising Voices Fellowship (RVF) blog posts and feel stumped. 

Surrounded by such profound talent, it’s not that I feel bad about myself or cosmically unworthy, but I find myself wondering what that makes me. Am I a writer? Or do I just write sometimes? I have ideas, but I have always struggled to pick apart the thoughts in my brain and organize them into coherent sentences.  

Joining RVF, I did not doubt my identity as Jewish feminist. My application was well-written enough. After all, I have always considered my writing to be decent enough. Truthfully, I applied for the Jewish feminist piece, not so much the writing piece. I questioned what Jewish feminism really had to do with writing—but I went along with it.  

At my first RVF retreat in August 2024, I still did not consider myself a writer. But, as my RVF buddies and I learned about the history of Jewish feminism, I learned how writing seemed to be an integral part to advocating for change.  

While still skeptical, I continued to keep an open mind to this idea of writing as activism and took on my first blog post as a challenge.   

Throughout the year, I saw myself improve. RVF became a platform for me to learn about writing from new people with the end goal of communicating an idea rather than earning a grade. I received feedback from peers who were interested in my writing, what I had to say, and wanted to help me say it better. I began to experiment with how I packaged and shared my thoughts, as my writing became not an assignment for class but a tool.  

Over the course of RVF, my writing has become stronger. I think carefully about organization: each sentence, each word. When I break rules, it’s intentional. I have come to enjoy writing as a way to inspire new thoughts and emotions. But I suppose I still don’t really consider myself a writer. I have ideas, though, I will always have ideas. Writing is a powerful mode through which I can express them, and I will continue to grow as a writer, finding new ways to make my ideas more powerful.